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per�fect (p�r f kt)
adj
.
1. Lacking nothing essential to the whole; complete of its nature or kind. ;
2. Being without defect or blemish: a perfect specimen. ;
3. Thoroughly skilled or talented in a certain field or area; proficient. ;
4. Completely suited for a particular purpose or situation: She was the perfect actress for the part. ;
5.
a. Completely corresponding to a description, standard, or type: a perfect circle; a perfect gentleman. ;
b. Accurately reproducing an original: a perfect copy of the painting. ;
6. Complete; thorough; utter: a perfect fool. ;
7. Pure; undiluted; unmixed: perfect red. ;
8. Excellent and delightful in all respects: a perfect day. ;
Where is perfect?
It�s been so many places at different times. And it�s changed in the blink of an eye.
blink
I am leaning into the front seat of my grandparents� green station wagon. We�re traveling to Conway for the first part of my summer vacation. Nana has decided the four-hour trip is a perfect time to teach me to blow a gum bubble. After many unsuccessful attempts, I manage a small one�a sweet smelling pink orb, sprouting from my lips. Nana claps and kisses me.
Perfect.
blink
I am 11 years old, president of my sixth grade class. Ms. Dow has given us a grammar question, one I immediately and assuredly answer. The class is almost evenly divided on opinion of what�s correct. Ms. Dow tells us we can�t move on until we agree unanimously. The two sides literally take sides of the room. Discussion ensues. People cross over as we vote, and vote, and vote again. Eventually, I am standing alone. The words get harsher. I won�t budge. Finally, Ms. Dow steps in, looks from left to right and smiles. �Jennifer is correct. Alone, but correct.�
Perfect.
blink
I unload one last box from the Artboy�s truck and look around the room. Though small, it manages to hold my bed, dresser, shelves and stereo. My new roommates have hung a �Welcome Jennifer� sign on the door. The Artboy plucks a green star-shaped pillow from the top of a box and props it up on the bed. �There. Now you have a new room, City Girl!� I have just written my first rent check. The space is truly mine.
Perfect.
blink
I�m in my living room, standing in a semicircle with Kristy, Dave, Jay and Judy. Mom and David are in front of us, facing each other, listening to Doug speak the words that make them legal. As they kiss to seal their wedding, �Back in the Saddle Again� begins to play quietly over the speakers. We all laugh and hug. David tells me how nice it is to have me be his daughter for real.
Perfect.
blink
I�m on the Artboy�s bed, naked except for one sock. His room is lit only by a black light bulb, screwed into the socket by his roommate as a joke. He leans over me with a yellow hilighter, smiling. �Did you know these glow in black light?� he asks me. To prove his point, he scrawls a long line along my stomach. When I laugh, he adds more. Soon, my torso looks like a Keith Haring painting. Along the original line, he writes, �I love you.�
Perfect.
blink
I�m looking out over the New Hampshire countryside from the top of Mt. Cardigan. Despite my almost passing out a third of the way up, the not-yet-Boyfriend and I have reached the summit. We�re on our second date. I�m somewhat amazed that I managed to climb a mountain. He congratulates me and then kisses me. I think to myself that I could easily be kissed like this forever.
Perfect.
blink
The Boyfriend and I are finishing an incredibly tasty dinner at the Coffee Cantata on Centre Street. His joking comment over chicken and mashed potatoes about getting married quickly morphs into a serious discussion. The waiter clears our plates, but we aren�t ready to move, so we order dessert. Over chocolate torte, we agree that it�s time to set a date. The way the tea burns my tongue when I sip too early brings me back around to reality. He and I have just decided to get married. For real. To each other. His smile melts my heart.
Perfect.
blink
So where�s Perfect?
Perfect is where everything fits. Perfect is where nothing else matters. Perfect is where I�d feel no regrets if it all ended, right there, and I was stuck in that moment forever.
What�s Perfect today is different than what was Perfect before David died, different from what was Perfect before I met the Boyfriend. Perfect today is different from what Perfect will be after the wedding, after my family becomes my Family.
Perfect can be anywhere.
blink
Perfect is in my mind.
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