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I am ridiculously irritable these days. It�s not pregnancy. It�s just a way of life. Would that I had something to blame it on, but it�s just me. Well, me and my irrationally short fuse.
Donna informed me today that she plans to do my review with me next week, not tomorrow.
Now, this wouldn�t be such a big deal. Except that, Diaryland, and this is where I hop up on my big soapbox and let out what�s been bugging me here for a couple weeks now, my review was due in APRIL OF 2000!!!!
Yep, that�s it, kids�I�m not due one merit increase, but two. One will be effective retroactively to April of 2000, and one will be effective retroactively to April 2001. Then, I�m also due a market adjustment on my salary, which will be retroactive to May 27, 2001. That means a retro check of somewhere in the vicinity of two grand, before taxes.
In large part, though, it isn�t the money. It�s the fact that our not doing my review until next week means it won�t go into the system until after the first of the year, which means that for the third year in a row, I�m ending the year on the same salary. This is not good for my pension fund, or my retirement account, or a handful of other benefits that are calculated at year�s end based on what we made that year.
And, of course, it�s the fact that I�ve gotten no feedback on my performance in�oh, I don�t know, FOREVER! Which sucks, since I don�t really know how my bosses feel about the work I�m doing here. I have to just assume that if they were dissatisfied, they�d tell me. Which isn�t always a safe assumption.
But, on the other hand, it is about the money. Especially right now, as we come to the close of the Christmas season. Because in the past two and a half years since I started making the amount of money I�m still getting paid right now, my life has gotten a lot more expensive. My rent�s gone up twice. I went from paying one third of my old rent to paying half of my new rent. The same goes for our utilities and grocery bill. Plus, life all around has gotten more expensive. And I�ve been muddling through, paying more things with the same income, for a long, long time.
Most of the time, it�s not a big deal. But right now, when you add presents for the 35 people on my Christmas list into that mix, things get difficult. And I can�t cut any of them off the list�it just isn�t possible. So�I panic and I get creative, and occasionally, I bounce a check (thank goodness for overdraft protection), and I wait and wonder if we�ll get a Christmas bonus, because that will enable me to not only finish the shopping on my list but also pay my car insurance before they threaten to cancel my policy (we did, by the way�Carl came around and handed them out about 15 minutes after my last entry went up).
And part of me feels terrible about bitching at all. I look around at all the people who are so much less fortunate than I am, for whom the question isn�t, �What am I going to get my stepbrother for Christmas that won�t totally break my budget,� but, �How am I going to feed my family this whole week,� or, �Where is my next paycheck coming from?�
I know that. And it�s not that I�m not thankful for what I have.
It�s just that I know that increase is coming my way. It�s mine, by virtue of my continuing to work here these past several years. It�s not out of line to expect my merit review to be processed in due time. And yet, it�s now over a year and a half overdue.
And yes, I�ve mentioned it before. It just somehow�never got done.
So now I have a huge retro check coming my way. At some point, somewhere soon.
Blah blah blah. I�m not just cranky; I�m whiny, too!
I can�t believe you�re still reading!
On a good note, my mom can feel her right foot again! This is very happy news!!!
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